Assclown Alert is a column of opinion, analysis and snark. After witnessing the parade of GOP lawmakers grabbing photo ops at former President Donald Trump’s New York hush money trial, Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick and two MAGA-minded members of Texas’ congressional delegation apparently decided it was their time to grovel. On Tuesday, May 21, as testimony wound down, U.S. Reps. Troy Nehls and Ronny Jackson joined Patrick in fawning over Trump and professing his saintly innocence.